Category Archives for "Kids"

1 How to deal with loneliness

megane2 asks: What do you do when you have no one to talk to? When the only person who understands you is not with you and you’re not able to reach that person… When you have so much to say and to talk about but you feel totally alone? What should I do?

Hi Megane2 –

 

This is such a sad question.  Of course, I relate so well to it too.  Handsome leaves me at home alone nearly every day, and my heart just cries.  I like to spend time by myself, but that’s very different from being left alone.  Having no one to talk to, or play with, or just to pat my head, when I need it – that’s so lonely and painful.  I just hate it.  And I can tell you do too.

 

Here are ten ideas for things that you can do, though, when this happens.   Some of them are things I can’t do, so you’re luckier than me.  But all can be helpful, I promise.

 

1)    Write a journal.  One person you can always talk to is yourself!  Write out your feelings in a journal or diary.  And lots of times, you’ll find that the actual act of writing can help you work out some problems, just like telling a Continue reading

How to do better in science classes

Tun Tun asks: Hi, I want to ask you why I cannot get good marks in science. I try my best always, but never get good marks in that particular subject. Can you give me any study tips for it???

Hi Tun Tun –

 

It’s no “breaking news” that different people have different interests and skills.  But it is always surprising when students who do well in most courses do poorly in one or two areas.  Handsome was kind of like you, but he also always had trouble with History classes.  Why someone should do well in Math but poorly in Science, or well in Literature but poorly in History, makes no sense to me, but it’s absolutely normal.  So I’m sorry you’re going through this, but please know, it can get better.

 

My guess is that the core problem is that you don’t actually find the Science class interesting.  Other classes deal with issues you are more drawn to than those in the Sciences.  So the first question I’d ask you is… why you’re not interested!  Science is the core of everything that we know exists – how beings live, how materials exist, what the rules of the universe are.  Which all sounds pretty interesting to me.  But I’m not a person.

 

Maybe if I were a person, I’d be more interested in how to make things work (as in Math classes where I’d learn to solve problems), or in how people think and act (as in pretty much all other classes, like History or Literature or Philosophy or Psychology).  So what the parts of a flower are, or how they procreate or grow or fade… just wouldn’t cut it for me.  Similarly, I might not be very interested in memorizing a Periodic Chart – I might not care what chemicals do what things – or understanding the Theory of Relativity.

 

But what if I looked on each Science class as a group of Mysteries?!  Maybe I just love mysteries, and if I could think of the class as one, it would suddenly fascinate me.  What if I made it my job to understand how flowers grow, or how a laser beam works?  And each bit I learned in class fed my chances of getting that solution?  Maybe then I could get myself to learn all that I’m supposed to, and then be fine (except for the annoyance of dealing with exams – annoying because the teacher always asks different questions than the one I’m struggling to answer!) as I progress through the course.

 

Anyway, that’s one thought.  Another is to divide all the stuff you have to learn into very tiny chunks, and memorize all of them in those bits, to the point where you’re carrying thousands of facts which you can then easily regurgitate on an exam.

 

But whatever method you use, the key is to find a way to be Interested in the subject.  If you just can’t find a way to do so, you might want to talk with your teacher, and see if they can find a way to help you with this.  And once you find an interest, then your job is simply to work as hard as, or harder than, you work in your other classes.

 

And then, truly the world is your oyster!  (And Tun Tun, if you can explain that sentence to me in scientific terms, I know you’ll do fine at school!)

 

Cheers,
Shirelle

 

1 How to make life interesting and fun

choco asks: How can I make my life interesting? Are there some tricks to make fun in life??

Hi Choco –

 

This is probably my favorite question anyone’s ever asked me, because this is what I’m best at.  You see, we dogs always can find something interesting and fun, unless someone’s literally put us in a tiny cage.  And you humans have every bit of what we have in our brains, and a lot more.  So why is it that you often can’t come up with something, when we always can?  It’s because of that extra brain you have!  You’re so much more judgmental and worried and self-conscious and all that, which all gets in the way of life!  (Now please realize, I also know that that extra brain does a lot of good; Overall it tends to be better.  I’m not putting you down here, just pointing out how it can be a problem!).

 

So what you need to do is get all that nonsense out of the way, and find your own Continue reading

How to get your parents to speak to you again.

Bella asks: Hi, my parents aren’t on speaking terms with me, and tomorrow is my birthday. What should I do? I tried talking to my mum but she refused to listen. I feel so bad!!!

Oh Bella!  I’m so sorry I didn’t get to your letter in time for your birthday!  I can’t imagine how you must have felt the whole day, and I wish I could have sent you some kisses and tug-of-war playing to cheer you up!  I know it’s late but… Happy Birthday!

 

And I’m not kidding when I say those two words.  You see, any day can be your birthday.  We can all be “born again” any time we choose to be.  Some people get that in a religion, others get it in a beauty salon with a “makeover,” some through moving their homes.  And you can have a new “birth” in whatever way you want.  The trick – and the hard part – is deciding what exactly it is that you Continue reading

1 How to salvage a broken friendship

megane2 asks: My best friend and I both had to move to different cities because of our parents’ work. Some complications and misunderstandings happened to us and her family does not like me and does not want us to talk or see each other again. It’s really hard. Sometimes I do talk to her online though when I get the chance, but otherwise we barely speak. I can’t call her because her family has caller ID. She is my best friend and like my sister and we’re really close, and now we’re just trying to keep in touch so we don’t lose our friendship… because friendship needs communication right? I feel like I have no one to talk to because she was the only one who understood me fully. Another thing is that I write her emails telling her what I’m up to and what’s new, and I wait for her reply, but she doesn’t care to. Sometimes I get the feeling she doesn’t want me anymore but I hurry and shake it off because she means so much to me. It really is hard. What should I do? Thanks and sorry for taking so long.

Hi megane2

This sounds really painful; but especially, it sounds Lonely!   It’s bad enough to live in a different city from your best friend, but then for her family to not like you makes it worse; and then for her to often not reply to you… that’s just awful!

So I’ve got all sorts of questions.  Like – was it just misunderstandings that turned her family against you, or was it something more; and why she isn’t replying (do they keep her from it, or is it her choice?).  So I’ll throw some thoughts at you, but please forgive me if I get some things Continue reading

How to deal with a sibling with abnormalities

Shefar asks: Hey, Shirelle! I have asked you a question before, so I won’t tell you about me again, but there is one thing you don’t know… I have a sister and she’s abnormal. I mean she’s not crazy, just that not normal like us. But she likes to win everything. She’s older than me, but things have to be fair, right? I mean now I fight with her and I am the one who always got blamed! She starts it and I am the one that’s got to be blamed! My parents really care about her cause she’s not “normal” and they always make me give up the fight… So can you give me any advice to put a stop to this fighting and always losing stuff?! I know it’s kinda complicated but I’ve only got you to tell me what to do.

Hi Shefar –

 

It would be easier for me to give you a specific answer if I knew what exactly your sister’s Abnormality was.  The way you describe it, though, it sounds like she has some sort of developmental delay, or perhaps some level of Autism.   If so, your frustration is VERY normal, in fact unavoidable.  I’ve known lots of kids in your situation, and it’s never easy.  I will give you some advice, but first I want to give you the good news:  growing up in this situation is going to make you a really great person, and others will be able to see it.

 

Meanwhile, though, it’s not Continue reading

How to tell if a boy staring at you actually likes you

1471999 asks: I am a 12 years old girl.A boy who is younger than me looks at me in the class very often. Does that means he loves me?

Hi 1471999 –

 

I need to split your question into two parts.  The first is the question of what the word “love” means.  There are other posts on this website about this – about how it’s different from a “crush,” about how real love takes time, etc.  You might want to check those out.

 

But the second, about what this boy is feeling?  My guess is that yes, he’s interested in you.  But be warned – he may not Continue reading

How can kids grow faster

Mia asks: How can one grow fast naturally?

Hi Mia –

 

Well, there are a few ways, but the one most people know about (and don’t want to do) is that if you eat lots of sweets and carbs and fatty foods, and don’t get any exercise, you’ll grow a lot – but only outward, not up!  There is a lot of evidence that today’s kids’ bodies are maturing way earlier because of certain chemicals in their food, especially in meats.  That’s not really a good thing, though!  We like kids to be kids for a while!

 

I think what you’re saying, though, is you want to grow taller and stronger sooner.  And the best way to do that is Continue reading

What’s important about Math and English classes?

WILL asks: Do you like Maths and English? I asked it because these subjects are my favourites, and I like to study them.

Hi WILL –

 

That is so cool!  I hear from kids all the time that they hate those two subjects!  It’s wonderful that you like them, and I’m guessing that some credit should go to at least some teachers you’ve had.

 

Now I have to admit, my knowledge of Math is mainly about comparing my running speed to that of a squirrel, and my knowledge of English is about grasping what I need to know to write here (and a few really important spoken words like “Come,” “Sit,” “Stay,” “No,” and “Hey what would you think of us going out and sharing a ham and Continue reading

1 How to become a famous singer

Nella asks: I want to become a famous singer and I have no idea how to begin that career.

Hi Nella –

 

Oh I know just how you feel.  If I come back as a human in my next life, I’d love to be a singer.  The way they’re able to just stand up there and open their mouths and put out beautiful sounds that make people swoon, cry, dance, or even think – that’s so cool.  My bark is, well, frankly, pretty hideous, so no one ever loves the sound of it (though Handsome’s awfully pleased with the way it scares off thieves and crazy Continue reading

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