Category Archives for "Parenting"

How to get your parents to speak to you again.

Bella asks: Hi, my parents aren’t on speaking terms with me, and tomorrow is my birthday. What should I do? I tried talking to my mum but she refused to listen. I feel so bad!!!

Oh Bella!  I’m so sorry I didn’t get to your letter in time for your birthday!  I can’t imagine how you must have felt the whole day, and I wish I could have sent you some kisses and tug-of-war playing to cheer you up!  I know it’s late but… Happy Birthday!

 

And I’m not kidding when I say those two words.  You see, any day can be your birthday.  We can all be “born again” any time we choose to be.  Some people get that in a religion, others get it in a beauty salon with a “makeover,” some through moving their homes.  And you can have a new “birth” in whatever way you want.  The trick – and the hard part – is deciding what exactly it is that you Continue reading

How to handle children going through bad phases

vanshica asks: Hi! My son is 8 yrs old in III std. For the last month he has been very naughty. He does not obey his teachers, in class he doesn’t complete his work, and disturbs class every now and then. He was not like this before. I am very tense and worried. Please help me out.

Hi vanshica –

 

Okay, I’ve got two things for you here.  First, every child goes through phases.  And it’s possible that he’s just simply doing that – going through a strange period where he’s misbehaving and pushing boundaries all the time, and he’ll move past it soon and be the great kid he was (just like… remember when he was two?!).

 

But then there’s another thought.  It sounds like it could be that he’s acting out because of something truly Continue reading

How to deal with a sibling with abnormalities

Shefar asks: Hey, Shirelle! I have asked you a question before, so I won’t tell you about me again, but there is one thing you don’t know… I have a sister and she’s abnormal. I mean she’s not crazy, just that not normal like us. But she likes to win everything. She’s older than me, but things have to be fair, right? I mean now I fight with her and I am the one who always got blamed! She starts it and I am the one that’s got to be blamed! My parents really care about her cause she’s not “normal” and they always make me give up the fight… So can you give me any advice to put a stop to this fighting and always losing stuff?! I know it’s kinda complicated but I’ve only got you to tell me what to do.

Hi Shefar –

 

It would be easier for me to give you a specific answer if I knew what exactly your sister’s Abnormality was.  The way you describe it, though, it sounds like she has some sort of developmental delay, or perhaps some level of Autism.   If so, your frustration is VERY normal, in fact unavoidable.  I’ve known lots of kids in your situation, and it’s never easy.  I will give you some advice, but first I want to give you the good news:  growing up in this situation is going to make you a really great person, and others will be able to see it.

 

Meanwhile, though, it’s not Continue reading

How can kids grow faster

Mia asks: How can one grow fast naturally?

Hi Mia –

 

Well, there are a few ways, but the one most people know about (and don’t want to do) is that if you eat lots of sweets and carbs and fatty foods, and don’t get any exercise, you’ll grow a lot – but only outward, not up!  There is a lot of evidence that today’s kids’ bodies are maturing way earlier because of certain chemicals in their food, especially in meats.  That’s not really a good thing, though!  We like kids to be kids for a while!

 

I think what you’re saying, though, is you want to grow taller and stronger sooner.  And the best way to do that is Continue reading

1 Why teenagers should be given more freedom

Aly asks: Why should teenagers be given more freedom in social life?

Hi Aly –

 

My quick answer is “Because if they’re not given it, they’ll take it!”

 

But more importantly, they’ll take their freedom without your wisdom.

 

It’s like dogfood.  See, Handsome tends to make and eat food that’s a lot more interesting to me than my regular dog food.  But I know I’m not allowed to grab his food off the counter or the table.  And because I’m eating enough of my own food, I can handle the rules, and just hope he’ll give me some scraps when he’s done.  But if he didn’t feed me my own food, and I was really starving, I’d grab every bit of his Continue reading

How to help teenagers get enough sleep

Judesaleh asks: Is it ok for my 12-year-old daughter to sleep over at my mum’s just because she doesn’t want anyone to tell her when to sleep and she likes to stay up sooo late? I can’t have any privacy when she is around. Knowing that my mum lives alone, and this is only during the summer vacation, what can I do to make her sleep earlier?

Hi Judesaleh –

Thanks for writing me.  I’m a bit confused by your question, though.  It sounds like you’re asking if it’s okay for your 12-year-old to sleep at your mother’s home (If it’s a safe place and they both enjoy it, then I’d say absolutely!  Grandparents are one of my favorite things, and I think there’s nothing better for a kid than to spend time getting to know them).  But it also sounds like you’re asking how to get your 12-year-old to go to bed earlier when she’s staying with you.

 

That’s a very common and difficult problem.  When children are young, most of them are “early folk,” going to bed early and then waking up well before their parents are ready to get out of bed, eager to greet the new day.  But when kids hit the beginnings of Continue reading

How to stop sibling rivalry when they’re ages apart.

spikie asks: how do I get my 16-year-old daughter to be more loving to her 10-year-old brother?

Hi Spikie –

 

Of course sibling rivalry is as old as brains!  I fought with my litter-siblings, Cain fought with Abel, JR fought with Bobby… oh it just goes on and on!  I will say, though, that usually when siblings are of different genders, and especially when they’re more than a few years apart in age, the rivalry is usually finished by the time they’re your kids’ ages.  So my first thought is…  give them a Continue reading

How to get over someone you broke up with

Kimy asks: I broke up with my first boyfriend but now I just cannot get him out of my mind. What should I do?

Hi Kimy –

 

I’m so sorry.  I know, it’s very very hard to move on after a breakup.  The people you loved so just get into your mind and heart, and even though you’ve chosen to not be with them, they haunt you like a ghost.

 

A lot of people have very specific advice:  Date other guys, or Avoid all guys, or Take a vacation, or Dye your hair a new color…  I can’t tell you that any of these are right or wrong.  The fact is, you just have to get through this time.

 

What you’re experiencing is actually the Continue reading

What to do when you see evidence your boyfriend might be cheating.

Lilies asks: I am in a relationship with a guy and I love him so much, and I know he loves me too, but recently I saw a post on Facebook — a girl said she is in relationship with him! I ask him about it and he said the girl is his cousin. I asked the girl too; she just said the guy never mentioned my name before in any of their chats. I don’t want to lose him. What do I do?!

Hi Lilies –

Hmmm…  You know that feeling you get sometimes when you go out at night for a walk and to pee on a bush somewhere, and nothing is clearly wrong but you just get that feeling?  Your ears pick up, the fur on your back rises slightly, and you just don’t want to step forward because there’s just something that’s off?  (Well, it’s probably a little different for you humans, but that’s what it’s like for Continue reading

Do good students always “fall off” as they near the end of high school?

pia asks: Hi, I have just completed my 10th, with a very good percentage. Many people have told me that students who score well in 10th usually tend to get low in 12th and fall in bad ways. I have lost all my confidence and motivation! I hope you understand my problem.

Oh what a bunch of poops!  I’m a big fan of telling the full truth, but this is a perfect example of what happens when people talk NEGATIVE all the time!  Look at you, Pia!  You are an excellent student, and clearly have a really good attitude.  Now do some students fall off at the end of their high school years (especially if they’ve already been accepted to a college or university)?  Absolutely.  But do you have to?  Of course not!

And look at what these naysayers have done to you!  You say that you’ve “lost all confidence and motivation.”  Yucch!  I hate Continue reading

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