How to deal with a boyfriend’s family when one of them won’t accept you because of your caste
Sneha asks: I love my boyfriend, and have been struggling with his family not wanting me, because I’m of a different caste. Now I learn that his mother is scared of his father – she was talking to me on the phone and suddenly said “his father is coming, I can’t talk to you now!” But yes she is talking to me nicely, even more than her own son she talks to me lots as she makes cakes! She loves to talk (she has a cake shop), and she loves that I give her some good tips to promote the business. But she told me today she had talked to his father, and he said he is searching girls for my boyfriend, that he will never accept me because their community will boycott them, “And one other thing, I don’t find anything good in that girl!” What should I do?
Hi Sneha –
I am heartbroken over this! EVERYONE is on your side except this one man, and I don’t want him to win – especially with his dumb line about “I don’t find anything good in that girl.” Well Mister, I don’t find anything BUT good in her, and I’m not seeing much good in you right now, so there!
It’s actually making me think of a great old romantic story, it started as a French novel, The Lady of the Camellias, but later became a great movie Camille and one of the most popular operas ever written, La Traviata. The difference is that the girl in it isn’t of a different caste – she’s a courtesan (or high-class prostitute!). Still, this young man falls very in love with her and she with him, and all is fine except that his father refuses to let them marry, believing she’s only using his son. Eventually she becomes ill, largely from heartbreak, and the father goes to her to apologize, realizing she was sincere, but it’s too late, and she dies in her beloved’s arms.
Great novel, great movie, great opera… and a LOUSY way for your story to end!!!
But I bring it up, because even that father did come around eventually. And I’m thinking maybe this one can too.
But the only way is for all three of you – you, your boyfriend, and his mother – to
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