Category Archives for "Life Skills"

0 How to get a conversation going

sazuna45 asks: There is this guy I like. He’s kind of a friend and he is super friendly whenever he’s alone and I’m alone. So I want to talk to him but I really don’t know how to start a conversation. Please advise me! I can’t just say ‘hi’ cause then he’ll answer and walk away. Something that’ll keep a conversation longer?

Hi sazuna45 –

Your problem is a really common one.  You want to get a conversation going, but nothing you say gets that effect.  It’s like when I’m at the dog park, and I try to get the boy dogs to chase me, and they’ll notice me and run after me, but just for a second, and then walk over to something else.  How irritating!

The main trick I know for conversation is something called “Open-Ended Continue reading

0 How to deal with test anxiety

eiei asks: I am sure to fail chemistry in 1st Semester. I studied well but I can’t answer well. And the teacher will scold me and students will tease me. I know I must try in 2nd semester very much and I can pass 1st year and attend 2nd year. But I can’t face this moment. Results will be out soon, I’m sure I’m the only female with this problem, and everyone will notice who failed. I can’t sleep and eat from thinking about it. I know it’s crazy, but I’m feeling like I wish I were dead!

Hi eiei –

I really have two answers for you.  But the second is only if you actually do fail the test.  Can you promise me that, if you’re right and you fail (or even do really poorly), you’ll write me and let me know?  That way I can send you a letter about what to do in that situation.

But I’m not going to send you that letter yet.  And the reason is simple – I want you to STOP THINKING ABOUT FAILING!  Is it possible that the teacher grades “on the curve,” and your ending grade will be a bit higher than your scores so far would imply?  Is it possible that you’ll get points for effort, or that there are quizzes and things you haven’t taken into account?  Is it possible that Continue reading

0 How to convince your boyfriend you’re not lying to him

Shannon asks: My boyfriend won’t believe me – he thinks I am lying to him. Instead, he believes his ex girlfriend, who used to be my friend, but we have broken up our friendship. What should I do?

Hi Shannon –

So, of course, I don’t know what your boyfriend thinks you’re lying about.  Maybe his ex is saying you’re being mean to him, saying things behind his back, or even running around with other boys.  But regardless, it really comes down to one thing – closeness.

You see, she used to be the closest one to him.  And back then, he cared a ton about everything she did.  If she stood too closely to another boy, then that might bother him.  If she called him a name, that might bother him.  If she didn’t return a call from him quickly enough, that might bother him.

And now she’s out of that position, and you’re in it.  And more importantly, if she lies to him, it doesn’t mean that much, but if YOU lie to him, it means Continue reading

0 Should you trust a former enemy who wants to be your friend?

kittycat asks: My school enemy suddenly became my friend again. Now she’s tight with me and my BFF! Should I discuss it with my BFF or think it out thoroughly before I take more desperate measures? Is it normal, or are my BFF and I the bait to her master plan?!

Hi kittycat –

Oh I wish I were a psychic, instead of just a dog!  I am absolutely no good at all at knowing what people are thinking, especially people who I’m only being told about.  Is this former enemy nefariously planning to hurt you and your BFF, or is she truly liking you now?  I am clueless!

And of course the truth is – so are you.  And that’s really the important point here.  You don’t know. So your job is to make a decision based on Who You Want to Continue reading

0 How to find a website for 12-year-olds

zainacute asks: These days I feel so bored. Can you help me to find a website for 12-year-olds?

Hi zainacute –

Well, my friend, you are ON a website for 12-year-olds!  You’re just the right age for AskShirelle.com.  (Of course, so is just about everyone else who’s old enough to read it!).

There are just countless websites out there for young people.  The answer would be for you to look for what interests you.  If you like basketball, find sites about that.  If you like old Frankenstein movies, find sites about that.  If you like music, find sites about your favorite singers.

The only warning I want to put is that there are lots of sites out there that are not for Continue reading

0 How to teach a young child to read

Natasha asks: How can I get a 4-year-old to read?

Hi Natasha –

Most children don’t learn to read quite that young.  But my friend Handsome did.  So the one suggestion I can give you is what happened to him.  It was very simple.

First, when he was very very young, less than two years old, he had a babysitter who started teaching him the alphabet.  She taught him to sing it, and would show him the letters.  So by the time he was less than three, he knew the alphabet perfectly.

Then something happened that no one expected.  You see, Handsome always loved Continue reading

0 What to do about asthma?

shortiee asks: If I have an asthma attack, what should I do? And why did my asthma begin when I started to be a teenager?

Hi shortiee –

All mammals breathe, and depend on breathing throughout our lives.  We dogs count on it even more than you people, as we breathe to regulate our temperature, panting while you folks sweat!  So there’s hardly anything I can imagine that’s as scary as the idea of an asthma attack, and the sudden inability to fully breathe.

Now as I say a lot on here, I’m no doctor.  They don’t let dogs into medical school.  But here’s a good website that will tell you a lot about asthma and how to Continue reading

4 Why would a child be bored?

Marussia asks: What should be done about a 6-year old boy (my son) who says he is often bored? Yesterday we were having a walk at a place where two his peers were playing football. My son didn’t approach them till one of their mothers invited him to take part in the game. My husband says we shouldn’t force him to play with other kids or invent some games for him – he is big enough to realize that if he wants to have fun he should do it himself. What do you think?

Hi Marussia –

When kids say they’re bored, it usually means one of two things.  First, that there’s just not anything around that’s interesting to them.  While an adult might just relish the thrill of seeing all five hours of Wagner’s opera “Gotterdammerung,” it’s not something I’d recommend foisting on an eight-year-old!

But the other reason is that there’s something going on inside the kid that’s keeping them from embracing life as they should.  You see, we dogs are a lot like young kids.  And if I walk into a new environment, my nose is sniffing everything, my ears are perked up, I’m looking around…  I might be a little nervous or scared, but I’m sure not Continue reading

0 What to do when someone threatens suicide

pinkflower61 asks: There is a girl in my class who mostly stays alone and is very sensitive. Once I talked to her – she appeared to be sad and she started talking about how she hates her life and thinks of suicide. I don’t know what to do about her – or should I do nothing because it is something usual for teens?

Hi pinkflower61 –

You’re right that it’s very common for teenagers to think about hurting or even killing themselves, without ever doing it.  But it’s also way too common that teens do hurt themselves, or at least try to.

The fact that you talked with this girl just shows that you’re great.  So many kids ignore the quiet loners.  You may well be the best friend she has in the school, even though you barely know her.  So the single best thing you can do to help her through this time is… just chat with her again.  Just be a friend.  I don’t mean that you have to make her your total responsibility, but what if you had lunch with her one day?  What if you introduced her to your other friends?  What if you even invited her to go out with some other kids some night?  This could truly change her Continue reading

3 How can cancer affect the lives of teenagers?

wiggles asks: What are five ways that cancer affects a teenagers life?

Hi wiggles:

If you read much on my website, wiggles, you’ll see that I’m a pretty friendly dog.  I basically like everyone.  I don’t hate many things.  I don’t even hate cats as much as I imply (they just irritate me a lot and I want to chase them away!).  But one thing I just DESPISE is cancer!

I don’t like illness in any form, and I certainly hate the sadness and loss of death.  But cancer is such a cruel illness!  It’s so debilitating, and often so horribly painful.  And even the treatments we have for it, most obviously chemotherapy and radiation, are so painful and miserable…

Think of it this way: If you get a bad cold, your coughing and sneezing will actually clean out your Continue reading