1 How can I help my friend deal with strict parents?

Angelbrat asks: Hey Shirelle, I have a friend who moved away from our town to study. We keep in touch by texting and e-mailing each other, and she seems unhappy. She always wanted to study spa and later make her own business but her mum made her decisions and she has to study Management. She tried to talk to her parents but nothing worked. Plus she has to do all her lessons in Dutch. Gosh, that is hard. As a friend it breaks my heart to know that she is really unhappy. How can I help her??

Wow Angelbrat, you’re right, that does sound hard!  Both for your friend and for you!

It’s one of the hardest things for anyone with a big heart, to see someone they love going through a really tough time.  We feel so helpless!  I’ve watched Handsome go through everything from breakups to operations to hard classes, and not been able to do anything to help him.

EXCEPT – and this is really important – I always told him that I loved him.  He’d be sitting all miserable on the couch, and I’d bring him a toy, or he’d be having a tough phone call and I’d walk up and lay my head on his Continue reading

0 How to encourage children to talk freely to parents, and not keep secrets

eyobkunu asks: How do we encourage kids to talk freely to their parents, and not keep secrets?

Thanks for asking this, eyobkunu.  It’s a fascinating question.

I’ve said on here before that dogs never lie, but you bring up a great point, that dogs also never keep secrets.  So I’ve had to really struggle to understand exactly what secrets are, and why people keep them.

The whole point behind secrets is that most people are very social, and love to tell most things in their lives to most of the people they know.  It really makes people feel good.  When I meet other dogs, I interact with them by sniffing them, playing with them, maybe some wrestling, maybe some barking, lots of chasing.  But when people meet, they usually, except for a quick handshake or Continue reading

0 How to make your parents happy

sunny asks: How can I be a good son, and make my parents happy?

Hi sunny –

What a wonderful question.  It’s a great goal, to want to make anyone happy – whether it’s your parents, or a stranger, or a nice dog who loves to give advice.  There’s just one problem with it:  you can’t.

If you look at the June issue of The Pawprint, you’ll see a big piece I wrote about how to make yourself happy.  But the awful truth is that you can’t make anyone else happy.  I know, it’s crazy!  Giving them what they want should be enough!  But sometimes…

You know, Handsome loves me more than anything else in the world.  But sometimes something goes bad with his work, or a friend hurts his feelings, and suddenly he’s just not happy.  It doesn’t mean he’s mad at me, or that I’m doing anything wrong, but no matter how many chew toys I drop in his Continue reading

1 Why are young people undisciplined

cool asks: What are the reasons for lack of discipline among youths?

Hi cool –

Well I am exactly the right one to ask about this!  Because I was a terrible puppy!  I loved to drive Handsome absolutely nuts with biting, chewing, yelping, escaping, jumping on strangers, anything I could do!  And when I say “puppy,” I really mean until I was around 3 years old (which in dog years means 21!).

So why was I so undisciplined?  Lots of reasons.  The main one was that it felt Continue reading

0 How can school teach children about jobs

1 asks: I’m a teacher in primary school. I want to know how I can give guidance to children about jobs.

Hey 1, good for you!  So many teachers avoid talking with young children about jobs, and only teach them official subjects.  But kids want to know about jobs, and it really helps for them to see how their book-learning applies to the work they’ll be doing in the big world some day.

At the same time, because you’re teaching Primary school, you’re going to face a lot of kids who (correctly) have dreams that extend beyond their Continue reading

0 How should a teenage girl dress?

Charis asks: I don’t know what has gotten into me, that makes me feel so self-conscious these days. I used to be unbothered with what I wore, only caring about whether or not it’s comfortable. But now, I think of how people would think about me, and whether my so-called fashion sense would allow me to fit in with my other friends. However, my friends said that I have a very ‘Auntie’ style. I usually wear long jeans with a sweater. To me, it’s just being conservative so as to avoid giving guys the wrong impression. But, to my friends, I am being a coward by being scared to show some skin. I tried to shop for slightly-above-knee dresses, but I felt uncomfortable in them. I can’t take it anymore. What do I do?

Well Charis, here’s the good and bad news:  Welcome to Teenagerhood!  It’s great that you got to spend your childhood being a sensible girl who cared mainly about comfort, practicality, and safety.  Now here all that intelligence goes – whoosh – out the window!!

Now am I saying you’re not intelligent anymore?  Of course not.  In fact, in many ways, you’re smarter than you’ve ever been.   But now that you’re a teenager, some things matter that never mattered before.  Like just how important other people’s opinions are, and whether or not you’re attractive to the people you’re attracted to.  And especially Being Continue reading

0 How to prepare for cumulative exams

Angelbrat asks: I’m supossed to do my IGCSE exams in November, and yet I don’t feel like I’m ready! I’m always babysitting my little brother and at times I don’t have time for my studies! What should I do? Do you have any method of studying that can help me? I’m counting on you, please!

Hi Angelbrat –

It sounds to me like you’re dealing with two issues.  As far as the question about study methods, I’d refer you to CaNdAcE’s question about school tips for teenagers.  I threw some good stuff in there, if I do say so myself!

But I think you have a bigger problem than just study techniques.  And that’s called Time Management.  It’s hard for teenagers to manage time anyway, and you’re supposed to be babysitting your little brother – so how can you possibly get everything done?

The answer is the most boring word any teenager ever hears:  Continue reading

4 What can a 14-year-old do in the summer

beliberXD asks: I am 14 yrs old. I feel so bored in the summer holiday I do not what to do (except to hang out with my friends). There is nothing fun to do. I always ask my parents to go out to somewhere, but they are busy and they do not allow me to hang out with my friends. Can you tell me what can I do, in this boring holiday summer, that would make me feel happy? Thank you.

Oh beliberXD, this is what makes me the saddest about 14-year-olds.  You’re too old to want to sit around playing toys, but too young to take the car out and go exploring.  Then it makes it even worse that your parents aren’t allowing you to hang out with your friends!  Do they really not want you to see your friends at all, or is it just that they won’t let you hang out as much as you’d like (or as late as you’d like!)?

The way you describe it, I don’t know exactly what I can suggest.  So I’m going to make a bunch of suggestions, but each will be based on a question:

1. Will they let you Continue reading

0 Why do politicians think they’re so special.

aqib asks: Why do politicians think that they are the honor of the state, instead of that they are the state’s servants?

Boy, aqib, you might be asking the wrong mammal.  Historically, we dogs have always had what’s called “pecking orders,” where our packs are led by the dog who’s the strongest and best fighter.  And even in today’s domesticated world, you’ll see dogs pick fights to determine who’s the top male and top female in an area.  But beyond that, we don’t really have leaders – and we certainly don’t have politicians.  Now that’s not to say that our method is better than the ways you humans live – it’s just different.

But as I look at the history of the human race, I see so much about this issue – kings and queens and dictators and presidents and prime ministers, all wanting to think they’re the best thing there is… but almost always figuring out at some point that they’re actually just Continue reading

3 How to stop bedwetting

Mahad asks: My four-year-old son is in the habit of bedwetting. Do you have any suggestions? I really want to resolve this issue because it is becoming problematic for us.

Oh Mahad –

I so feel for both your son and you.  It’s very difficult, I know, to live with someone in your house who has bladder control, and it’s painful and humiliating to be the one with that problem.

With me it’s been slightly different.  I was able to get paper-trained and house-trained very quickly.  After that, there were a couple of times when Handsome was so stressed out it made me lose control, but otherwise I’ve been fine.  With one exception!

That exception is that dogs, unlike people, get inspired to Continue reading