Category Archives for "Scary Stuff"

6 The Man on the Roof – the importance of experts

The Man on the Roof – the importance of experts

            Okay, before I get to anything else, let me be very clear on this.  I don’t use, and no dog ever has used, toilet paper!  That’s all on you guys!

            There’s a terrific story – I don’t know where it came from originally.  It tells of a religious man who is warned that a great flood is coming.  But because of his deep faith, he trusts that he’s safe. 

            It starts to rain, and a neighbor pulls up in their car, and offers to drive him with their family, to where it’s dry. 

            “No thank you, I trust in my God, and He will save me,” he tells them.

            They drive off, wishing him the best.  And it keeps raining.

            It rains so hard and so long that the street floods.  Another neighbor comes by, floating down the street in a boat, and offers to let him on.

            “No thank you, I trust in my God, and He will save me,” he tells them.

            And they wish him well and paddle away. 

And it rains yet more.  And the water rises so high that only his roof sticks above water, so he sits on it waiting.

A police helicopter flies over, and from a loudspeaker, orders him to grab the ladder so they can fly him to safety. 

            “No thank you, I trust in my God, and He will save me,” he yells to them.  And eventually they fly off to save other people.

            And it keeps raining, and eventually he is drowned and dies.

            His soul goes up to Heaven, where he, as he had always hoped, meets face-to-face with God. He exclaims his shock and disappointment, “I had faith in you, and you let me die!”

            God shrugs his shoulders and snaps at him, “What more could I do?  I sent you a car, I sent you a boat, I sent you a helicopter, and you wouldn’t accept any of them!”

            Now today, in our modern technological world, we’ve been sent something else.  Experts.  We have a lot of experts.

            There’s so much knowledge out there, no person could ever know even a small portion of it.  But you have each other, and between the seven billion of you, you guys know an awful lot!  We other animals are constantly impressed.

            But then, we also get shocked when we see you ignoring all that expertise and choosing easier or dumber answers instead.

            We hear of people who insist that our planet is flat, though everyone from physicists to airplane pilots offers proof that it’s not.

            We hear of people who swear vaccines cause Autism, though that has been disproven many times.

            And in just this past month, we’ve heard a global pandemic referred to as no big deal, as a “hoax,” as particular to a particular race of people, or as a military plot, and people being told to buy up all the toilet paper and water they can – all by voices who share one thing in common: None of them are experts, and none were using the information experts told them!

We don’t know, and maybe never will, exactly when the Chinese government first realized there was a new, highly contagious, virus in the city of Wuhan.  But once the word got out from there, we know that there were experts all over the world who had studied diseases, viruses, medical supplies, government reactions and actions, and all sorts of other essential aspects of a situation like this.

And we know that a lot of those experts spoke up.

And we know that a lot of people in governments, in businesses, and in media, found what they said unwanterd, and so ignored it.  Or even lied about it.

And because of those corrupt actions, a lot of people will get sick.  And a lot of people will die.

            But wait, are so-called “experts” always right?  We’ve seen throughout history that of course that’s not the case.  So how do you choose who to listen to, and who to believe?

            I have a solution. 

Now normally I’m a big optimist, but you know we dogs are also guardians, so we have a certain pessimism as well. 

My idea is that if you ignore the experts, you’re a fool.  But if you put all your trust into one expert, they might turn out to be incorrect, or a phony.

But if you listen to, and act on, what all the different experts say, your odds of getting the right answer improve a lot. 

So a person might get sick and be told that a chiropractor, an acupuncturist, vitamins and hydration, or a medical drug would help.  Which should they do? Well, if it’s just a little sniffle, you can ignore it.  Or if it’s a cold you get often, you can just do what usually works.  But if it’s something bad, why not do them ALL, at least as much as you can afford?  In the end, when you get better, you won’t know which of them worked and which didn’t, or if it was a mixture of two or more… but you’ll be well, right? 

            So imagine if, when the news about this virus came to light, every government in the world had immediately invested in testing, started research to develop vaccines and cures, arranged to follow people entering and exiting their borders, to see if any were infected, to limit transmission.  Would there have been needless expenditure?  Sure.  Would one or only a few countries gain an enormous economic boost when they created and patented the right medicines?  Yep.  

And would this have staved off a worldwide humanitarian and economic disaster?  Absolutely.

            Now it’s too late to fix what’s gone wrong.  But on the biggest level (governments, diplomacy) and the smallest (our individual lives), we can learn from this experience.  I don’t know how bad it’s going to get, but no one’s saying the human race won’t survive (and the scientists are now saying we dogs aren’t susceptible to it!  Whew!).  So the world can benefit by our learning.

            But for now, just do me a couple of favors.  Wherever you live, wash your hands with soap more than you normally do, control your coughing and sneezing to keep it from going at people, and DON’T HOARD WATER AND TOILET PAPER!  There’s absolutely no reason to, and you’re creating worse problems than existed before!  (Truly – you’d be in way more danger living in an area where people can’t get toilet paper than you are from Coronavirus!)  Plus it’s just mean.  And at times like this, we need to be as kind as we can.

            Trust me on this.  In this one single area (how we treat others) I am, yes, an Expert!

What to do when your ex connects to you in your dreams.

Maya asks:

Hi Shirelle 
I’ve been having weird dreams, like every time I go to bed all I can see in my dream are robbers, stealing our property and we’re down again to level zero, with totally nothing. After this dream the next thing I see is my Ex – he’s not acting weird in my dream but when I wake up in the morning, he’s tried to call me, but since I moved on with my life I’ve never bothered myself to answer any of his calls. Anytime I get that weird dream, I must get his call the very next morning or during the day that he tried to call. What’s going on?!
Please help me.

Hi Maya –

WOW is this cool!

I’m not an expert on dreams.  Most of mine, as with most dogs, involve hunting or fighting.  I’d like to have more where I’m getting fed yummy treats and being tummy-rubbed, but those activities seem to be confined to my waking hours – and not enough of them!

One thing I do strongly believe is that different people (and dogs) have different gifts.  One person is musically amazing, another can throw a ball so far with perfect accuracy… and some people have some second sight.  The ability to see something that isn’t visible to the rest of everyone.  Maybe that involves picking up on people’s energies (lots of dogs have that one), or, as in your case, having some ability to predict, or cause, something in the future.

Why am I saying “cause?”  Because I don’t know if your dreams are your awareness that your ex is going to call, or they’re making him call!  It could go either way!

But what’s clear is that, for whatever reason, when you have those dreams, he calls.  And, for now, that’s all we know.  

My advice really has nothing to do with your relationship with this guy.  It’s that I strongly urge you to keep noting anything like this.  Some people keep a pad of paper and a pen by their bedsides, so they can write down their dreams the second they wake up (since our memories of most dreams run away from us faster than a truckload of cats!).  You have a gift.  And we don’t know exactly what it is yet.  But it should be honored and investigated.

Maybe you can predict some things.  Now your lonely ex calling isn’t that big a deal, but what if you could predict something really good, or really bad?  Or maybe, as I said, your dream is actually encouraging him to call.  Well today, you have no power over those dreams, but what if you eventually found that you did?  It would be like prayer or manifestation times a thousand!

So again, to me this is just amazing news.  Yeah, it tells you not to answer your phone without looking when you’ve dreamt of robbers in the last couple of nights.  But it could become SO MUCH MORE!!

Congratulations!  I’m proud to know you!

Shirelle

What to do when your boyfriend’s or girlfriend’s ex is hurting themselves to win them back

Quirkymesss asks: I was in relationship with a guy for a year and a half. I then came to know that he was already dating someone, and had been for three years. So his girlfriend found out about me one day and threatened me to stay away from that guy. But this guy comes again in my life and apologizes for everything, and says he wants a relationship with me too. I also can’t refuse to accept his proposal because I love him and he told me that he also loves me. And again his girlfriend found out everything (I know I wasn’t doing right thing but I can’t forget him), and still he came back to me. This actually happened three times and I am not a girl who is so strong or fights with people. But the girl threatened to come find me at my college, and I have to leave that guy because I don’t want any big issue. She says they’re committed to each other, but he was saying that she is blackmailing him by cutting her wrist (and he show me that too). And that she is not ready to leave him, and that he wanted to broke up with her, but he is not doing this because he’s afraid she’d do something to me if he did. So I just want to know how to solve this situation, in a way that nothing bad wouldn’t happen to any of us.

Hi Quirkymesss –

I have two very different answers for you.  One is how to deal with her, and the other is with him.

I’m feeling pretty bad for her.  He may say she’s blackmailing him, but it sounds to me like she’s an emotional mess (which is very different from being a Quirkymesss!).  If she really is threatening suicide, she needs some psychiatric help, and now!  She’s in great danger – and as you point out, you might be too.  Whether he stays with her or not, he needs to help her find someone who can help her deal with her fears and her pain.  Even if she was doing this just to manipulate him… would you  have cut your wrist to keep him?  Clearly not!  So I’m saying, she’s got issues and needs some help right away.

Okay, but now to the other question: Him.  I know you started the relationship not knowing about her, but he didn’t!  He knew perfectly well that he had been with another woman for a year and a half, and started dating you, not telling either of you about the other one. 

What does that say about him?

And even though she’s been manipulative, the fact that he kept you both around for another year and a half makes me worry a LOT about your relationship.  Let’s say he gets her some mental health, and is able to leave her, without her hurting herself or you.  Great.  But will you be able to trust him then?  What’s going to go through your mind when he’s away for a number of hours, or on a trip for his work?

And here’s my biggest question – has his behavior somewhat CAUSED her pain and craziness?

When I lived in the dog pound, I saw a lot of older dogs who were really messed up.  Chewing their paws till they bled, running in circles, all sorts of odd behaviors in their cages.  And I don’t think they were like that as puppies.  I think they were a lot like me originally.  But tough lives, and abuse and abandonment, and being locked up in pounds – all of those things sent them kind of mad.

So maybe this guy is great – but I’m not seeing it right now.  And I don’t want you turning into her! 

So while I’m very eager for her to get the help she needs, I also want to give you just a little nip on the ankle, to say “Hey Quirkymesss, be sure to notice this.  The hair on my back is up a little bit.”

With all my best,

Shirelle

4 A Prayer for Jessie -The Importance of Importance

A Prayer for Jessie – The Importance of Importance

            I hate it when Handsome’s out of town, even for just a day or two.  But I do love it when he comes back – our reunions are fun even if he’s only been gone an hour, but if he’s been gone overnight, we explode!  I sniff him all over, while he tries his best to hold me tight (and can’t).  And eventually we just stop and look into each other’s eyes, and feast on the fact – all is okay, we’re together again.

            The problem, of course, is that I’m not the only being he ever cares about seeing.  If I were, he’d never leave!  For example, he tries to visit his parents every month or so.  And because he’s afraid to put me in an airplane’s cargo hold (and I’m too big and excitable to qualify as a Therapy Dog and sit in the passenger section), the only times I’ve ever been able to join him on those trips are when he drives there, which takes a couple of weeks at least.  I love it, but he can’t do it very often.

            And, just as with me, he worries about his family a lot – some say too much.  So when he hasn’t seen them in a while, he gets anxious.  So it’s good that he visits, and he always feels so much better when he comes back home.

            Well, except this last time.

            A few days ago, he showed up, and we gave each other our usual crazy greeting, but I could tell something was off.  Was something wrong with his parents, or his niece (who, I’m very proud to say, gave me a new human cousin a couple of days later… WELCOME TO LIFE, JACKSON!) or his nephew, or…?

            No, it wasn’t any of them. 

            “Knucklehead,” he explained to me, “I just spent a half hour on a plane, the longest flight of my life.” 

            Now you know, we pooches aren’t all that good at math, so I struggled with this, not coming up with any answer.  Till he explained, “I spent the flight next to the sweetest woman, who explained to me that she was flying here because her son had just been killed.  And not out of anger, or even a robbery.  He was killed, the police believe, by mistake.  He had just dropped his girlfriend off at her house, the girl who seemed like she might be The One for him, and on his way home, he was shot.  Apparently by someone who thought he was someone else.”

            My heart sank.  We always hear about these things happening, but here it was, right in front of him, and now me.  “He was her only son.  And he was a really great guy, whose life and career were just taking off.  And somehow this woman had to go through this – for no explicable reason.  And she’ll never get over it, not for a second.”

            We are all programmed to believe that we will outlive our young.  That’s why it’s so hard for a dog when one of our puppies doesn’t make it through birth.  But to raise a child, and raise him well, and then have him snuffed out just as life begins to bloom into accomplishment and romance?  This is too much for anyone to take.

            Handsome asked her how she was able to be so together at this point.  “I’m completely numb,” she smiled kindly.

            Then something happened kind of beautiful.  The flight attendant asked them for drink orders, and Handsome wished to himself “I’d love it if she’d order something alcoholic, because I’d love to buy it for her – and she could sure use some help today!”  (He’s not normally a big one for using alcohol as self-medication, but since she’d be greeted at the airport by her grieving daughter, this could prove an exception)  But she just ordered a cola, and the attendant moved on. 

            Till about five minutes later, when she leaned into him and whispered, “Could I ask you a favor?  Could you wave that nice man down and ask if he could slip a little whiskey into my Coke?”  Handsome exploded in joy, “I was WISHING you would ask that!  Yes, and I’ll buy it for you!  It’s the only thing I can do to help!”  He ran up and ordered the drink – and do you know what?  They gave it to her for free!

            As the plane landed, he took her hand and wished her all the strength humanly possible, to get through this.  And she looked him in the eye and said “Please pray for me.”  And they disembarked, probably never to see each other again.

            Well as you can guess, by now, he had me whining on the floor.  No wonder he’d felt distant.

            Especially as he was feeling so… fortunate!  Here he’d just spent a fun day with his parents, and was about to welcome a new baby into the family.  And coming home to the friendliest pup in the world.  It wasn’t fair – everyone should be having the time he was having, and not suffering this horror.

            So he asked me to write this.  To tell this story, and to think about what it means to me.  And I’ve thought a lot, and here’s what I came up with:

            I get letters from you guys, all the time, often very full of love, but complaining about your parents, or siblings, or your kids.  I know deep down you love them more than anything in the world, but just as I can take Handsome for granted at times, or he can forget how important I am to him for moments, all of us can detach a bit from how much we love, and are devoted to, our closest companions.

            So take just a second, and put aside how annoying they might be, and think about how you’d feel if your mother, or father, or brother or sister, or uncle or aunt, or your child, were suddenly taken away from you.  And how they’d feel if you were robbed from them forever.  (And if you’ve already lost one of these people, let that feeling come through – how you miss them, and what it would be like to talk with them, laugh with them, hug them, or maybe sneak that drink to them!)

            I’m not trying to guilt-trip you, not at all.  I just want you to feel the love that life and stresses can make us forget. 

            You see, there’s one other thing about that woman.  Her name is Jessie.  That’s the name of my favorite cousin, a great great dog owned by the family that just had the new baby.  And Jessie died a few years ago – a loss they, and I, can never replace. 

            Coincidence?  Maybe.  You’ll just have to decide for yourself.

            But if you can do what I asked, just take that moment and feel all that love in your heart – with its joy and its pain and its frustration – then I think you and I, and everyone reading this, will have fulfilled that woman’s request to Handsome.  Our love will come together to become a beautiful prayer.

            And maybe, just maybe, all that love will give her the strength she needs, to get through what she has to.  Till the day she can join her son again, and maybe, just maybe, find out why things like this have to happen.          

            Because this doggy has no idea.

Is it right to stay with someone when you’re not expected to live as long

GREED asks: My Girlfriend has a heart problem. She says that it would be a waste for me to stay with her, because she can’t trust her health, or might die young. She says that I am the only son in the family, so I should find someone better. I told her “in times of sour or in times of sweet we will have it together.” What does she want or mean? And what should I do? How to deal with her?

Hi GREED –

 

My friend, if any member of my pack has a name less fitting than yours, I’m not sure who that’d be.  Any woman, and likely any man, who reads your letter is just going to melt, and wish they had someone in their life who loved them as unconditionally and beautifully as you love your girlfriend.  I’m going to declare you an honorary DOG – your love is just that perfect!!

 

Humans are innately subject to self-esteem problems, and while most people suffer for sillier reasons (“I’m not good looking enough,” “I’m not rich enough,” “I’m not popular enough”), your girlfriend has a devastating one: she has, possibly, a low expectancy for the length of her life.  I can’t imagine how awful that must be.

 

And she is being kind.  She feels you deserve a woman who can live with you for your lifetime, who can be counted on to raise children with you, who can be a help to you and not just the other way.  She doesn’t feel worthy of you.  And that is beautiful, and heartbreaking.

 

So you want advice?  I’ll give it straight here to you:  I want you to Continue reading

How to deal with creepy strangers

Melissa asks: Today after school me and my friends were sitting in the train station talking, when suddenly a bunch of men appeared and gave us problems, assaulting us. Both my friends were angry but I was calm when the man told me he so-called “loved” me. I said, “I love you too.” I even talked to the man who was bothering me to find out why he was doing this. Most people say you need to avoid such. Was I right to talk to them? Did I act in a right way?

Hi Melissa –

 

There are decisions in life where the answer is based on morality.  Is it right to insult a helpless person?  Is it right to hit a baby?  Is it right to kick a puppy?  (I’ll give you a hint about me – I’m going to say “No” in each of these cases!)

 

But other times, the answer of what is “right” is based on the result of the action.  The easiest example is something we’ve seen in tons of stories, where a ticking time bomb is reduced to two wires , one blue and one red.  If you leave them as they are, it will go off in thirty seconds and kill you and everyone around you.  If you cut one wire, it will blow up right away.  If you cut the other, you’ll defuse the bomb and save everyone.  But there’s no way of knowing which is which.  What’s the right thing to do?

Well, the only way to know is to choose a wire and cut it.  And you’ll find out very quickly whether you chose the right one or not!

 

As I see it, Melissa, you were in a “time bomb” situation.  You didn’t know these men, and neither did your friends.  You wanted to be safe, to not be hurt by them.  Maybe ignoring them would have made them leave you alone, and maybe it would have angered them and they would have harassed you in a worse way.  Maybe yelling at them to go away would have gone well, or very not.  And maybe being friendly and curious would work, or not.

 

Well you chose the latter, and it worked.  So, as with cutting the red or blue wire, you made the right  decision.  Now does that mean you should always do what you Continue reading

4 My Green Name Tag – the joy of celebrating cultures

My Green Name Tag – the joy of celebrating cultures

I have a green name tag that hangs off my purple collar.  Not by accident – Handsome loves the way those colors look against my orange and white fur.

This usually doesn’t mean a thing to me (remember we dogs are color-blind!), but there’s one day a year I’m really glad I wear something  green.  That’s St. Patrick’s Day.

On this holiday, at least here in the United States, there’s a tradition that everyone is supposed to “wear the green.”  And if you don’t, people have the right to pinch you.

Well I DON’T LIKE GETTING PINCHED!  It hurts, and I’m not allowed to bite anyone back if they do it!  So I’m glad my name tag keeps this problem away.

 

But just recently, I started wondering, what’s the big deal about this color?  And why should St. Patrick, not a super-important saint in the history of Christianity, get a holiday, when… oh, say, Peter, Paul, and Mary don’t.  (Hey, look what I just did!  If you’re old enough, or a fan of 1960’s folk music, you’ll see I just made a sort of joke.  And if you don’t get it, do a search for “Peter Paul and Mary” and listen to some of the most gorgeous popular singing ever recorded!)

 

So anyway, I did some research about this day.  And I found that it’s on the day St. Patrick is said to have died.  And the green is because it’s a color associated with Ireland, where he brought his religion. And the holiday is to honor the Irish people and their culture.

But wait.  I live in a country known as a “melting pot,” where almost every culture of the world exists.  Why is this day such a big deal?

Well, it seems that centuries ago, tons of Irish fled their homeland in the face of famine and oppression, and came to America.  And they wanted to honor their heritage, so over time, it became a holiday for everyone here – and now over most of the world.

So in other words, even if you’re a Moroccan-Serbian-Singaporean Sikh, you’re still supposed to wear green on the 17th of March, to show pride in your Irishness.  Because they were desperate refugees.  And dance to Irish music, and eat and drink their food, and just have the best time you can – all to honor something you’re not!

Silly?  Yeah, kinda.

And, I think, also kind of fantastic.

 

Most of the horrors of human history have been perpetrated because one group of people sees another as “different” or “the other.”  How great to have a day where everyone’s Irish.  Wouldn’t it also be great to have a day where everyone is Nigerian?  Pakistani?  How about a day when everyone’s some other refugee from a starving oppressed nation their country happens to be welcoming?  Hey how about if one day everyone was Israeli and the next day Palestinian?  Might people find it a little harder to blow each other up if they’d just had a party where they danced to those people’s music, ate their traditional foods, and – yes – drank their drinks too?!

I’ll make you a deal.  If you humans start doing this, I’ll agree to dress as a CAT one day a year; I’ll even eat tuna, scratch on a couch, and poop in a litter box!  All for the cause of world peace!

But till that day, I do hope you all get a chance to enjoy at least a little of St. Pat’s this year.  Dance an Irish jig.  Eat some cabbage and potatoes.  Drink some beer (if you can and should).  And raise a toast to your favorite Irishpeople ever (James Joyce?  John Wayne?  Enya?  Hey this pup is a total sucker for the voice of Bing Crosby!)!  And may the road rise to meet ya!

 

 

So my dear dear friends, I wrote all that earlier this week.  Then this morning I awoke to the sound of Handsome’s clock radio, to as heartbreaking a story as I’ve ever heard.  You’ve probably heard it already: In the beautiful town of Christchurch, New Zealand (yes, the town has THAT name!), some people took it on themselves to bring guns into some mosques where holy prayers were in session, and kill as many Muslims as they could.  This wasn’t out of a personal resentment; they were openly acting in this insanity called White Nationalism, trying to get rid of as many people who didn’t look like them as possible.  (And to clear their country of refugees – as though white people were the original inhabitants of those gorgeous islands, and not immigrants into Maori land themselves)

So on the same weekend people worldwide join each other in playing at “We’re All Irish,” we’re hearing yet once more the vicious scream of “You’re different, so we hate you!”

(And I promise you, it brings nothing but sadness and shame to America that one of the shooters hailed our President as a symbol of their movement)

 

Think of it this way.  On a purely biological level, every human is more like every other human than any of you is like any dog or cat or cow or bird.  And yet nearly every one of you I’ve met has loved an animal to the furthest limits of your heart.  This talk about difference, superiority, inferiority?  It’s all just… just what I’ll leave in a litter box when that cat holiday gets going.

 

Please, it’s just so simple:  Love everyone you can.  And those you can’t love, just like.  And those you can’t like, tolerate.  And if we all can do that, it’ll all be okay.

 

In fact, remember when I accidentally mentioned that singing trio earlier?  I’ll end this with a quote from I guess their most famous recording, which happened to be written by a man who as an adult changed his surname to one more… Irish!

“How many times must a man look up

Before he can see the sky

How many ears must one man have

Before he can hear people cry

How many deaths will it take till he knows

That too many people have died?

The answer, my friend, is blowin’ in the wind

The answer is blowin’ in the wind.”

 

LOVE,

Shirelle

Why men may develop breasts (gynecomastia)

Ryan asks: I have gynecomastia, a common problem in many today. I’ve been mocked by my friends, called names and embarrassed all my life. Recently my relationship almost broke up due to this. The girl found out and started to ignore me. I’m unable to work or think about anything else. Please help.

Hi Ryan –

 

 

For those who don’t know, gynecomastia is a condition where men develop breasts like women’s.  This is a true medical condition, not the “man-boobs” people jokingly refer to in overweight men.

 

The good news is that this is fully treatable.  Just as cosmetic surgeons can enlarge or reduce women’s breasts, they can reduce the sizes of yours to give you a normal male chest.  I don’t know where you’re from, or what health insurance will cover where you are, but it’s absolutely fixable, depending on your ability to afford it.

 

I do have a story about this condition, though.  Which might help you from having them grow back once you’ve had them reduced.

 

You probably know that there was a culture in the west in the Continue reading

How to change your mentality to be happier

Sravani asks: I want to be alive with happiness, but I can’t because of my mentality. Sometimes it feels like I wanna to die but I can’t.

Hi Sravani –

 

You’re right.  The only way to be alive with happiness will be to change your mentality.  And there are lots of different suggestions out there on how to do it – and I’m sure most of them are right for different people.  But you wrote me, so I’ll tell you how we dogs do it!

 

First, look for what’s interesting around you.  There’s always something.  A smell, a sight.

 

Now, look for what’s beautiful around you.  And if there’s nothing that you see, can you change something to make it beautiful?  Put a picture up, or get a flower?

 

Now, listen for what’s beautiful or exciting.  And if you can’t pick up anything, put on some music you love.

 

Now, smell, or better, eat something you really adore.  Super yummy.

 

And then, sit back and think about all this.  You just experienced so many pleasures.  Things only you enjoy as much as you do.  And try to feel grateful for them. Regardless of what you believe or don’t believe in – just feel some gratitude for having seen a bird, and heard that Cardi B song, and tasted a pomegranate!

 

Now, do that as often as you possibly can.

 

And what you’ll begin to experience, as your mind (literally, the workings of your brain) changes, is the realization that there’s always beauty and excitement around.  Even when things really stink.

 

And the more you pursue these, and the more you share them with others, the happier your days will be.

 

Now sure, there’s a lot more to do – there’s growth and dealing with old pains and there’s learning and there’s passion.  But right now, I just want some simple basic joys.

 

I think you’ll find it works.  It does for my whole species!

 

All my best,

Shirelle

Nothing to Sneeze At … all sorts of allergies

Nothing to Sneeze at … all sorts of allergies

Have you ever taken Antihistamines?

 

See, I’ve been thinking about Histamines lately.  We all know Antihistamines, but their job is to fight Histamines – a natural compound, released by the body to increase inflammation so tissues will bring in defensive substances  (mucous, white blood cells) when it feels attacked.  (Can you believe  a dog came up with that line!  Sometimes I even impress myself!)

 

Histamines are very useful when poisoned.  And very annoying when dealing with allergies.

 

I’m lucky.  I have never suffered any allergies.  But my human friend Handsome was a sensitive child: nervous, a worrier, and got sick often too.  Nothing huge or chronic, he just caught everything that went around.  And each time, what he’d feel was Histamines.  Like millions of microscopic mosquitoes, flying around inside him, stinging him constantly!

 

And I knew a dog who got awful allergies, to fleas!  He was bitten so many times, and scratched so much, that his immune system went haywire and he lost his fur and a bunch of weight… and eventually his life!  A wonderful dog, too, it was a horrible horrible thing to watch.

 

So it made sense for Handsome to take Antihistamines: drugs that blocked the production of Histamine in his body.  Working against his body’s incorrect actions.  But perhaps against his body’s defenses when they were right as well?  Maybe, but it did enable him to survive his childhood!  (They tried giving that dog some too, but I think it was just too late)

 

Now as we know, many of us have physical allergies.  But I think all  of us have emotional ones.  Oversensitivities, fears, based on deep-seated beliefs about ourselves and others and the world.

 

My biggest emotional allergy is to water coming down onto me!  I have no trouble jumping into a creek or the ocean, but I hate rain, sprinklers, and especially getting bathed.  Oh what I’ve put Handsome through, jumping out of tubs, shaking water all over him all the time!  The trick he eventually learned was to use a big cup, and slowly pour water over me while holding the back of my neck.  I still hate it, but that makes it tolerable.

 

Some of us wear our emotional allergies with pride – dogs who snap at anyone who reminds them of an abuser, “Hey you’re a tall man with long hair!  I’m gonna bite you before you kick me!”  Or people who gleefully reject romantic advances, “I know what you’re about!  You just want to hurt me!  I’ll never speak to you again, now that you just asked for my phone number!!”

 

While others find emotional Antihistamine.  Some adults drink when they go to parties, so they can be social.  Maybe you need to overeat when you do poorly on a test.  I haven’t found the way to avoid the feelings of water, but I sure know what to do afterward to get rid of the feeling: I shake it all onto Handsome and then run like crazy around the yard!

 

So is there a solution?  A motivational speaker might say that the key is to just walk through the allergies, suffer all the Histamines, to get strong and make it to the other side of them.  Right?

 

Wrong.

 

Let me tell you, I’ve had years of water coming down onto me, and I’ll never like it.  And I’ve seen sneezing fits in others – they don’ t end, and there’s no other side to it.

 

So does that mean we should just avoid anything that feels uncomfortable?  Or numb ourselves constantly?

 

It’s a hard one, isn’t it!  Just this week I met a woman, very interesting, funny, passionate, who said that she never wanted to see another play as long as she lived.  She found them all torture.

 

Now I don’t know what caused this in her, but I know there are all kinds of plays – dramas, classics, comedies, thrillers, musicals – and it’s crazy to think a human, with a human brain, would reject them all.  (Now let me be clear – I’ve never seen Cats and there’s no way I ever would sit through that filth.  But for a person to never experience My Fair Lady?!  What’s the point of having that great brain then?!)

 

Fundamentally it all comes down to one question.  Is it possible for anyone to live at such a state of awareness that their Histamines – physical and  emotional – only release when they really need to?

 

I don’t know.  If so, I’m not there yet.  And my friend Handsome definitely isn’t.

 

From all I can see, he’ll remain the same dorky man I’ve always loved – scratching, coughing, sneezing…  just as when he was that sensitive child, and for as long as his imperfect two-legged furless body carries him.

And calling me in that very friendly tone… to have a dreaded bath!