Category Archives for "Adults"

What are some important things to remember when addressing students?

jolly asks: I want to address my students on teacher’s day. Please give me some suggestions.

Hi Jolly –

 

I have to confess, I don’t know what Teacher’s Day is.  In my training classes, we didn’t have anything like that; the teacher just showed up with treats, noisemakers, and a leash – and from then on everything kind of went the way he wanted.

 

I also don’t know how old your students are, so I have no idea what interests they’d have.

 

But I can tell you a few definite constants:

 

1)    Be funny.  Most teachers aren’t, and kids get bored.  Also, humor tells the kids that you’re a good person, and can speak to their hearts.

2)    Only talk about yourself in ways that they can relate to.  If they’re teenagers, don’t spend a lot of time telling them how you learned to Continue reading

How to control yourself from talking too much.

Shefar asks: Hey Shirelle, can you tell me how to be quiet? I know this is lame to ask, but I can’t shut my mouth up in classes or anywhere else!

Ha!  Oh Shefar if you only knew my neighbors, you’d know how funny your question is.  Me teaching how to be quiet is like Marley teaching self-discipline or the hundred and one Dalmatians teaching birth control!

 

But I’m guessing that you’re not jumping up in class and barking because you hear someone walking around outside.  Or standing in the yard barking to hear if anyone responds.  You’re probably conversing, or at least responding to something someone else says.  This is a really common problem for young people (and some adults), and pretty easy to fix.

 

It tends to come from being very uncentered.  You’re in that giddy, excitable state of mind (which I know well!), and it’s hard to hold that excitement in.  Or you’re just being kind of unconscious, saying things without Continue reading

How a teenager can stop smoking

Bieberfever asks: I’m 13 years old and I smoke. How do I quit when I’m addicted to it?

Hi Bieberfever –

I’m so glad you asked this.  It’s such a huge topic.

There’s good news and bad news.  I’ll start with the bad.

 

To begin with, let’s talk about Addiction in general.  We all have things we like, and we want more of them.  I love pizza, for example, and will eat it whenever I get the chance.  But that doesn’t make me a Pizza Addict.  Addiction is an actual physical thing, where the brain creates new neuron pathways, such that the person actually feels bad if they’re not getting the substance they’re addicted to.  It can be mild (like when we hear some grownups say, “I’m no good in the morning till I’ve had my first cup of coffee”) or severe (like alcoholics who ruin their lives by their need for self-destructive drinking), or even deadly.

At it’s core, Addiction is simply Stupid!  Think about it – if there’s something that you have to do even if you don’t want to, and it doesn’t serve you in any way, and you do it… that’s the definition of Stupidity, isn’t it?

But I’m not putting you, or any other addict, down.  We all have brains that are capable of addiction.  Yes, even us dogs (Even mice and rats can become addicts, which is one reason scientists use them for experiments on addictive substances a lot).  There’s nothing to be ashamed of about becoming addicted to something.  The trick to beating the stupidity – the sometimes very hard trick – is stopping the habitual taking of what you’re addicted to.

Now if you’ve been following me, you’ll realize that stopping taking that substance doesn’t mean you’re no longer an addict!  Millions of people have stopped drinking alcohol but still will tell you “I am an alcoholic.”  And they’re right:  their brains still have that pathway in them.  So again, the job they have to do is to keep themselves from indulging their addiction… every day of their lives.

 

Okay, that’s half the bad news.  The other is about cigarettes specifically.  While a dog will do lots of self-destructive things, one thing we never do is smoke.  Why?  Because our lips don’t work that way!  So I’ve never had a cigarette, though I’ve certainly smelled them.  Sometimes they smell kind of nice; but most of the time they kind of burn my eyes and nose so I’m not really into them anyway.

But what’s worse is when you learn what they do to you.  If people only smoked natural tobacco, the stuff we see cowboys smoking in those old westerns, they’d be hurting themselves, but nowhere nearly as badly as our modern cigarettes do.  In particular, when you start smoking anything, you destroy some very fine fibers in your lungs called Cilia, which help clean out the lungs when you have a cold or flu.  In other words, those first few packs of cigarettes mean that every respiratory illness for the rest of your life will last longer and be worse!

But today’s cigarettes have so many more toxic chemicals in them than even the natural tobacco does.  You’re literally inhaling poisons into your body, along with extra nicotine that the manufacturers add in to make it more addictive!  Truly, there aren’t a lot of legal substances out there that are nearly as bad for you!  Plus, they make you stink!

Okay, so enough with the bad news.  Here’s the good news.  Quitting smoking when you’re young has been shown to drastically reduce the long-term consequences (those really scary ones like emphysema and cancer).  If you quit now, at 13, you have all those best years ahead of you, where you can look better (cigarettes tend to give teens lots of zits), feel better, and be able to look at the other kids smoking and feel superior to them!

There are TONS of methods out there to help you quit.  Nicotine gum, the nicotine patch, mouthwashes that make your mouth taste bad if you smoke, and many many more.  But the truth is, none of them will work unless you truly want to quit.

And if you truly want to quit, nothing can stop you.

 

My suggestion would be to start by doing three things.  Do these for one week.

First, every time you really want a cigarette, and would have had one before, let yourself have one, but only smoke one third of it.  That way you’ll satisfy your craving, but start reducing the amount of nicotine your body’s receiving.  (Note: but don’t then start smoking more cigarettes than you used to, to make up for it!!  Keep the number of cigarettes down to equal or less than your current habit.)

Second, about every half hour, drink a glass of water.  And if you can drink more, do so.  Cigarettes dehydrate you, and if your body starts getting all the water it needs, it’ll like the idea, and crave cigarettes less.

And third, do some exercise every day that makes you breathe.  Run, walk, or (best) swim.  Your body will be gasping for oxygen, and, just as with the water, that will make it start craving the cigarettes less.

 

Okay, great.  If that worked, then, after that first week, keep doing all the same stuff, but make yourself hold off on smoking till the sun has gone down.  And then don’t allow yourself more than one (1/3) cigarette every two hours.

And then, third week?  Quit.  Stop.  Cold Turkey!  Your body will complain, you’ll crave all sort of other things.  Fine, do them!  Eat a chocolate cake, drink two liters of Pepsi, eat a bag of chips, who cares!  You might get headaches.  Okay, pop an Aspirin or something.  Big deal.  All that matters is that you’re freeing your body from its worst enemy.

And if you can make it through that week, Bieberfever, I can almost guarantee you that you will start to feel better.

 

Did I say “better?”  How about… way better!  You’ll like the way you feel when you wake up, you’ll smell better, you’ll have more energy, you’ll look lots better, you’ll have a better attitude, you’ll start to enjoy your life more, like other people more, have an easier time with your schoolwork…

And yes, you might feel so good that you start to tell yourself that what would feel especially great would be to have just one more cigarette, that it’ll be fine, because you’re over your addiction… right?

Wrong!!  Don’t do it!  Your addiction will just kick right back in, and you’ll get right back into your old habits, and have to go through all this again!

 

You see, my friend, this may be one time when you want to go against the advice of that idol of yours.  He said to never say never?  I think saying “Never smoke again” would be a great exception to his rule!!!

 

Good Luck, and please tell me how it goes!

Shirelle

 

How to improve at test preparation and relaxation

Juicy asks: How do I concentrate in my studies? When I get lots of work to do, like when I have two tests on the same day? And then how can I relax on weekends, when I’m so stressed?

Hi Juicy –

 

Everything you’re talking about really comes down to one thing – staying centered.  To concentrate on your studies, especially when schools pile on the work and tests, and yet be able to de-stress, is a great skill that can improve one’s life immeasurably.  I’ve heard that one reason Julius Caesar was able to do so well in his battles was that he had the ability to completely relax and take very short intense naps, so that when his opponents’ generals were sleeping through the night, he’d be able to wake up after an hour or two and plan the next day’s strategy.  Now I’m not suggesting you try to get by on two hours’ sleep a night, but it’s a pretty cool Continue reading

How to work with someone who doesn’t do their share.

Che asks: What do I do with a co-worker who always does the planning and lets me do all the work?

Bite ‘em!

 

Well, that’s what I’d want to do.  Handsome is more of the “slap them hard on the side of the head” school.  Other suggestions would be to put thumbtacks on their chair, shave half their head’s hair while they’re sleeping, or make a video of them being lazy and show it to all the other co-workers.

 

But most likely, you don’t want to do anything that drastic.  Since as you’re the one who’ll get in trouble.  Especially if you Continue reading

Why do men cheat?

Kim asks: Why do guys cheat?

Hi Kim –

What a great question.  I know you’re asking about males in particular, but I have to ask my version: why do people cheat!

We dogs are very loyal, and often jealous.  I would never “cheat” on Handsome; I really wouldn’t know how.  And when I see him petting another dog too much, I get furious…  at that other dog!  I don’t see Handsome as a cheater at all; I just make sure that other dog understands that that man is mine!

But at the same time, I don’t want you to get the idea that I’m just a pathetic boring mutt who can’t enjoy anyone else but my Continue reading

6 How to get someone to admit they like you.

varonikar asks: I have a stupid problem. I know a boy who loves me, but he won’t tell me so. I also love him. So what do I do to get him to tell me he loves me?

Hi Varonikar –

Hey this isn’t a stupid problem, it’s a delightful one!  This is one of the most exciting times you can have in your life, when you know what you feel and what he feels, but no one’s saying what they feel.  So now comes the fun and scary part — how do you find out for sure how he feels, and get him to say so?!  Maybe get a friend to ask him if he likes anyone?  Or try hanging around him and see how he reacts?  Or you could do what I do – just jump on him and lick his nose.  But it seems that dogs get away with that a lot more than Continue reading

How to tell someone you aren’t interested in them romantically

Makina asks: If a boy likes me but I don’t like him the same way… I can’t tell him that, so what should I do?!

Hi Makina –

You know what?  You’re a terrific person.  You are kind and thoughtful, and you have a heart as big as all outdoors.  In other words, you’re a lot like me!  But people and dogs like us sometimes need to learn some funny lessons about how to treat others lovingly.

You see, when you say that you can’t tell the boy how you feel, you aren’t just a little bit wrong, you are absolutely completely totally FULLY wrong!  Actually, the kindest, most sensitive, best thing you can do is to tell him exactly what you’re Continue reading

Why a young child won’t eat

Shahriar asks: My child is not taking food, even when I insist. She is now three years old. I’m very hopeless. What can I do?

Hi Shahriar –

There are lots of possible reasons for a three-year-old not wanting to eat.  Some of them are emotional (she’s feeling sad, or excited), some are just defiant (she doesn’t want to do anything you want her to, including eating), and some are physiological (she may have stomach pain, or really bad allergies to some foods).

Of course, the first thing you need to do is to rule out the physiological ones.  And there’s no good way to do this except to take her to a doctor who can check her out.  Any qualified pediatrician will know exactly what to test to find out if there’s anything wrong with her.  And of course they would be the best people to suggest what to do if they do find something wrong.

If they determine that she’s not suffering from a physical problem, then your job is to find out why she’s refusing the food.  Again, it could well be that she’s just being defiant (what we normally hear called “the terrible Continue reading

How to meet a celebrity

Aqua asks: I want to meet Taylor Swift, but I live far from her. What should I do?

Hi Aqua –

Wow, I’d love to meet her too!  She’s one of the few humans I’ve ever seen who’s even thinner than me!   And I’ve always loved music, all sorts, so she’s my kind of human.

Now with lots of celebrities, like movie stars, it’s virtually impossible to have any access to them.  But pop singers like Taylor Swift have a different situation.  They tour, all the time.  No matter how many recordings they sell, or how often they’re on TV, they still depend a lot on making personal appearances, and having contact with their public.

So the odds are very good that, no matter where you live, Taylor will be fairly near you at some time.  The tough part is that you don’t just want to see her singing “Love Story” and “Speak Continue reading