tinamv asks: This is kind of silly but I really want to do musical theatre classes, but the only good school in my area is the same one that my crush goes to, and I don’t want him to think I’m following him or anything because (embarrassingly) he already knows I like him. What should I do? Should I go anyway and ignore if he says anything? He and I are friends now, and I don’t want to like do anything to make him feel awkward. It’s very nerve-wracking.
Hi tinamv –
I find your question kind of funny, because I think you’re hitting on the two things that most terrify my Pack members – performing and approaching crushes. Both make humans incredibly self-conscious. And you’re kind of talking about dealing with both.
With two exceptions.
First, you seem to like performing. You’re not being forced by a teacher to get up and sing in a chorus, you’re looking at having spotlights on you while you act, sing, and dance! In this regard, you are FEARLESS!
And second, as far as your crush goes, the ‘damage’ is already done. He already knows you like him. You’re even friends.
So you’ve already done the two hardest parts of this.
The only part left is the goofy self-consciousness all humans are prone to, where you’re imagining the way someone else will think. And literally considering changing your entire life plan, and giving up on your great dream, because of the possibility your imagination of his thinking might be right!
So, tinamv, do you know what the word mantra means? It’s a special word that people repeat over and over, mainly in meditation. Often it’s in an ancient language like Sanskrit, but you can probably imagine the effect it would have on a person’s mind and spirit if they repeat a word that means “Love” or “Holy” or “Goodness” over and over again for hours a day. Right?
Well I’m giving you a mantra. Just for now. Are you ready? Here it is:
Do you have a favorite musical theater star? I don’t get to see plays (they won’t let me in theaters) but I’ve seen some great ones on TV, so I’ll just pick one of them. Imagine if you heard the following: “Hey I heard that Judy Garland had such a crush on a guy when she was a teenager that she followed him across town!” Or “Did you know that Gene Kelly actually only went to dancing school so he could be near his crush?” Or “Rumor has it that Frank Sinatra didn’t just sing about falling in love too easily, he really did!” Or “I have it on good authority that Bette Midler is just wildly romantic!”
Ummm… what’s your response to these (All of which I’ve completely made up)? I’ll bet it’s something along the lines of “So What?!”
Wouldn’t it make sense that Judy Garland or Frank Sinatra was all that lovestruck at some point, since you can hear it in their singing? And can’t you imagine that Gene Kelly or Bette Midler might live life in a wild romantic way, since that’s how they seem when they perform?
In fact, wouldn’t it be downright disappointing to find out “Actually, Hugh Jackman is a boring guy who’s never fallen in love, and Audra MacDonald has never taken a risk in her life?”
So I’m saying that, even if your fears all come true, that won’t be all that bad.
But I also think there’s a way to make your fears NOT come true. And that would be to KNOCK ‘EM DEAD at that school!
Your first day, don’t walk in there and shyly say “um, I’ve always wanted to sing, and I’m hoping you’ll teach me…” Instead put out an “I Had a Dream” that’d make Anne Hathaway give her Oscar back! Throw them an unexpected dance like the end of Napoleon Dynamite. Give ‘em a Shakespeare monologue that puts them in tears.
And if you do that, no one will ever think you went to that school for any reason except to hone your talent. Your incredible skill.
In fact, if you’re that good, instead of this guy worrying that you’re there because of your crush on him, he might start worrying that you’ll notice him staring at you in the halls, dreaming about you in class, and singing all his love songs with you in mind!
So my advice is absolutely to apply to that school. But then work on your stuff before you get there, so no one ever questions you again.
Ooh, in fact, I have a better idea yet for what you should prepare! Give them a “Ya Got Trouble” that lets them know that THEY’ve got trouble, right here at school, with a capital T and that rhymes with TINAMV!!!
Let me know how it goes!