What to do when you realize you’ve been used in a relationship?

PerryB asks: I had a crush on a guy I go to school with. I told him and we talked it over, and a few weeks later he said that he had developed feelings for me and he asked me to be his girlfriend. Shortly after, we became intimate. Then, after about a week of us being a couple, he texted me and told me we have to break up, that things between us had gone too far. I was crushed, and I haven’t been to school ever since, but I have decided to go back after a week of being locked up in my room, since I want a future for myself. But I don’t know how I should react when I see him at school, since there is no way I can completely avoid him. Please give me some advice on what I should do.

Hi PerryB –



Humans are such a strange species.  You guys have such incredible gigantic brains, which accomplish so much, but this also means you worry tons about things we dogs would never give a thought to.


Now maybe this guy didn’t mean to hurt you.  But even if so, he did.  He hurt you really badly.  You feel used and rejected, as any human would.


And you’re the one who’s scared to go to school?!  Dear, if a dog treated me that badly, they’d be the ones to be scared with every step they took!  Not knowing if I’d be around any corner, ready to sink my fangs right into their hindquarters – and they’d know they deserved it!


Now I understand, you’re embarrassed and all that.  But my advice is to pretend you’re not.  Go back to school, and when you see him, just walk on by.  Ignore him completely.  Don’t look at him longingly, don’t let him see you sad.  And (and this part is really important) don’t complain about him to your friends any more than you absolutely have to.  Just let them know he’s proven a lousy boyfriend, and you want nothing more to do with him, and that’s all.


Do you see what this does?  Number one, it makes you the powerful one, and might even make him feel a little shamed himself.  But two, it gives you a chance to move on in life.


And that’s what I really want.


I’m sorry if you did things you wish you hadn’t with him, but none of that matters now, unless you let it.  The fact is, he had something great in this relationship with you, and he threw it away.  And the better you feel about yourself, and the more you’re able to move forward, the better chance there is he’ll start to see it that way.


(Whereas, if you’re letting this rotten experience ruin your life, it’ll just make you look like less than you are, and he might get to think he was right to let you go.)

So do what I’d do.  Tail up in the air, head held high, and let those ears flap with every step.  And go find someone in that dog park who smells even better!


(Okay, well, I guess you don’t need to worry about the floppy ear part!)


All my Best,


About the Author

Leave a Reply 0 comments

Leave a Reply: