arjai101 asks: I don’t really know what to do anymore. I guess I’m just over high school. There is absolutely nothing for me there anymore. I realized that yesterday. My friend canceled on me…again, but, still managed to go on a triple date the night before on a whim with people she doesn’t even really like. The friends I do have don’t really do it for me, never really did, to be honest. Actually, everyone and I mean everyone you could think of is dating or got something going on with someone else and I can’t even find just a normal friend to hang out with me on the weekend. I have a license and nowhere to go, just as my mom long prophesized. I’ve been thinking of just going to college two years early, I got into a state university, and I’m taking some math classes there this summer. And I’m applying to another university, which has a great engineering program for their fall semester. If I get in there, I’m definitely not going back to high school. I’m tired of taking classes that don’t fuel my drive. I feel like everyone just thinks terrible things about me. No one takes me seriously. The administration and teachers who are supposed to vouch for me don’t even remember my face when I wave at them in the hall, even though I was in their class just last semester. I feel so lonely. Well, I’ve felt so lonely these past few days. I’m an extrovert; I need people. But, I feel like an unwanted burden to everyone. I don’t think there is anything wrong with me. In theory, I feel that I’m a pretty cool person to hang around. All I feel is just shallow acquaintances. What should I do? Should I just skip out on the last two years of high school? How do I meet people outside of this suffocating circle? I feel like I go to places where I should meet people, but people are so distant. I’m horribly frustrated. I need a breath of fresh air. I need to feel valued.
Hi arjai101 –
I understand this completely. I was very good in obedience class when Handsome took me there, actually was the best student in the class I’m proud to say, but I never liked it (except that I got a lot of treats when I learned things correctly). So I was very happy to leave it, and would have loved leaving it earlier if I could have.
And if you’re such a good student that you can get into an engineering school this early, I can’t really give you a good reason why you shouldn’t do it. But I can suggest that you use that great mind of yours to really think it out before you make a decision.
One of my favorite humans is a young woman who works with my friend Handsome. She’s brilliant and funny and kind and… did I say “young?” She’s this young, and this far along in her career, because she started college when she was fifteen years old! She then went straight through it and immediately went to graduate school, so she had her Masters’ Degree when she was twenty-one, an age when most people are still undergraduates!
And when she gets asked about whether it was the right thing or not, she never gives a simple, straight answer. She loved the intellectual stimulation, and, like you, loved being away from the immaturity she saw in some high-schoolers. But she was also very young, compared to her classmates. And of course, college and university classes include students from all the years there, so imagine – she was fifteen sitting next to people over twenty in class, all the time!
So it was great, but it was also very isolating. College is a time when people tend to grow very quickly – in relationships, in attitudes, in intellectual maturity. And as bright as she was, she was way behind the rest. So it was a bit lonely for her.
But at the same time, she liked a lot about it. And she came through it just fine, and has a great life today (which includes, maybe no surprise, that she has a boyfriend a good deal older than she! Maybe she kind of got used to that back then!).
So I can’t tell you yes or no on this decision; all I can tell you is to treat it like a scientific experiment – to learn everything you can about everything involved, and look at all the variables, and then make the wisest choice you’re able to. And I think I can guarantee that, whatever you decide, you’ll like some things about whichever road you take, and you won’t like some others about it… and either way you’ll end up the wonderful thoughtful smartie you are – just with different life experience!
Can’t wait to hear what you decide!