How to get over someone

Libra 10.8 asks: I’ve known this guy for two years and can’t seem to let things go. The whole thing is pretty stupid on how the whole situation started and ended. There are strong feelings and emotions that are hard to face on my own. Feelings and emotions that I can’t really overcome or explain. I even get myself jealous over thinking about him with another girl. I really got myself attached to this person having no idea why; ever since then I’ve became more insecure about my self. Trying to let this person go but it’s becoming more difficult.

Hi Libra 10.8 –


I wish I could help you, but I would need to know a little more about what’s happened, to give you any specific advice.


What’s clear from your letter, though, is that you are way more attached to him than you’d like to be.  I’m hearing that great old song in my head that goes “I don’t like you, but I love you, seems like I’m always thinking of you, oh oh oh you treat me badly, I love you madly, you’ve really got a hold on me.”  Is that pretty close?


If so, then my advice is to do ANYTHING you can to get over him.


Now what do I mean by “ANYTHING”?  Well, for starters, don’t break any laws.  And don’t do anything that hurts you (drinking to forget someone has never actually worked, for example).  And don’t do anything that would make things worse (sending a hate letter to him won’t free you at all; it’ll just make you feel bad about it later).


But really, that leaves thousands of things you can still do.  Ask out ten other boys, even if you don’t find them all that attractive.  Go out with friends and try a bunch of activities you’ve never done.  Give yourself an assignment to take your mind off him (For example, do you like the current rash of superhero movies?  If so, have you seen every Marvel flick?  Why not do it now?!  Or do you like romantic comedies?  Go online and find lists of the best ones ever made, and see them all!)  Start some activity that has a goal and requires lots of focus – maybe you want to learn gymnastics, or to paint well, or to tap dance (oh I’d love to do that!).


The point is to put your focus (maybe it’s even an obsession) onto something else – ANYTHING else!  One great thing is to support some cause.  Maybe you care a lot about pollution, or a political movement, or… maybe you actually love us dogs!  Can you give some time and attention to helping out in that area?  You’ll find you start caring more and more about it, the more you do.  And this guy will start mattering less and less.


Libra 10.8, I have some very good news for you.  Of course I don’t know anything about the rest of your life, or what’s going to happen in the future, but I can guarantee this: anything you choose to focus on, and put your effort into, will feel better than this does now.  And so, at least in that way, your life is about to get better, the second you start.


So my advice is to choose something and get started on it…







All my best,




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