How to find one’s feminine energy

Lovedino123lady asks: How do you be more ladylike and girly?

Hi Lovedino123lady –

Well, my friend, no one has ever accused me of being ladylike.  If I’m compared to anyone in that famous movie about dogs, I’m way more Tramp than Lady!  But I’ll try to help you out anyway.


The fact that you’re asking me this question probably means that you have a sense of what appears more girly or ladylike:  wearing dresses instead of pants, sashaying around instead of walking with direction, not punching or biting anyone!


But I don’t think that’s what you’re really asking about.  I think what you’re really after is how to increase your feminine energy.


It’s very important to acknowledge that everyone has both a feminine and a masculine side.  We think of fighting as a masculine trait, but women get in fights all the time.  We tend to think of nurturing as being a feminine trait, but we see fathers doing great jobs of nursing babies (with bottles) every day.  We all have both.


So what you want is to keep real, as real as you are today, but to let your feminine side out more.


The best way I can think of to do that is simply to try.  Go to a clothing store, dressed in your usual jeans, and try on some dresses.  If you look in the mirror and feel ridiculous, than that dress isn’t really you.  But if you look in and feel transformed, then that’s your feminine side you’re seeing.


Similarly, maybe you gravitate toward boyish activities and entertainment.  Well, there’s nothing wrong with liking sports and action movies, but look around and see what else you might like.  Are there more traditionally girlish activities you might enjoy (cooking for your family, shopping with friends) or entertainments that females tend to like more (maybe check out some romantic comedies that your girlfriends enjoy)?


I don’t know what they’d be, but again, when you find the ones you like, they’ll help your engage your feminine side more.


And then?  I’m a big fan of imitation.  Is there a woman – whether a famous singer or actress, or someone in your own life – who you look up to as a great example of femininity?  Then imitate her!  Try to dress more like her.  Try to walk like her.  Try to talk like her, move like her, wear your hair like her…  it’s okay to go too far!  You can always pull back later.  What you want is to find the parts of imitating her that begin to feel like they’re now naturally you!


And the more you find those, the more naturally ladylike, and girly, and truly beautifully feminine, you’ll become.


Good Luck my friend!






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