How to tell a fake friend from a real one

Prettyndsweet12 asks: What is the difference between a real friend and a fake friend, and how can I tell my true friends and my fake friends???

Hi Prettyndsweet12 –

 

I wish I had an easy answer for you.  The truth is that you never know that someone’s a fake friend until it’s too late, and they’ve done something that hurts you.  And that can happen with a friend you’ve had for a week, or for ten years.  You just never know.

 

What’s most important is that you keep one thing in mind: Everybody sees things from their own point of view.  So it’s quite possible that a friend might do something that you find hurtful, that they mean nothing bad at all by.  So here’s my suggestion:

 

When a friend does something that hurts you, go to them in the belief that they didn’t mean to be cruel.  Try to give them a chance to speak from their point of view.  Bend over backwards to give them that chance.  Because friends are just about the best thing there is, and you don’t want to lose any you don’t have to!

 

And if, when you do that, they explain it to you, and listen to you, and try to make your relationship work again, then it’s worth keeping.

 

And if they don’t – if they laugh at you, or insult you, or just start making bad things up about you… or even threaten you (and yes I’ve seen all these happen!)…  Then they’re useless.  They’re rotten friends, and you’re better off walking away and letting them fend for themselves.  One thing about rotten friends, they’re never just rotten to one person – so the word about them will get around!

 

Again, I wish this was an issue you simply didn’t have to deal with.  But the truth is that, sometimes, a friend turns out to be lousy.

 

But most times, they’re not – so be sure and give them that chance!

 

Cheers,
Shirelle

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