How to deal with being rejected in a one-sided situation

Wolfpack asks: I am in a one-sided situation, but this is happening in a way that everything around me makes me feel like i should talk to her. (I have already confessed my feeling, but i have not been speaking to her much often since then), she has said she does not wants to be in a relationship with me. Help me!!

Hi Wolfpack –

 

If I’m understanding you right, you told a girl your feelings for her, and she said she doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you, and now you’re wondering what to do.

 

The answer is simple: you should take care of yourself, in whatever way works best for you.

 

Lots of humans get a big container of chocolate ice cream, and eat the whole thing in one night.  Do they feel kind of crummy the next morning?  Sure, but for some reason, doing that helps them move forward.  Maybe you’re more the sort to go out with friends and talk about it, or write a song, or just beat your head against a wall.

 

Whatever it is, she’s been honest, and that’s a good quality.  And your only job is to do what you have to, so you can move forward, and not get stuck in the pain of that rejection.

 

We dogs, when we’re feeling that bad, might just go outside and howl up at the sky.  And when we do, we’ll often inspire other dogs to howl along with us, all over the neighborhood.  This is the single best thing I know of, since it makes us feel so connected with others (instead of all alone, the way rejection usually does).

 

But again, you know yourself better than I do.  Give her the space she wants, take care of yourself, move forward, and who knows – maybe you’ll meet someone better tomorrow, or maybe she’ll even change her mind.  But regardless, you want to be in a strong, happy, confident place yourself.  Which sadly is the exact opposite of where you are now.

 

And remember, the best thing you can do in life is to love.  So even if it hurts right now, the fact is, you have loved.  And that makes you, and your life, wonderful.

 

All my best,

Shirelle

 

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