DogLover101 asks: How do I keep my relationship with a new boyfriend secret from everyone, and stay happy together? It’s kinda like a forbidden love, and my friends are starting to get suspicious!
Hi DogLover101 –
So this is cool! I love keeping secrets, especially since I’m really bad at it. Like I’ll try to sneak up and grab a lamb chop off of someone’s plate at dinner without them noticing, but they almost always do.
What’s great about this secret is that no one’s being hurt by it – it’s just the two of you keeping what’s special between you.
The first thing I’ll recommend is that you both work very hard to act around each other as if nothing has changed – which is very different from acting “normal.”
I know a man, for example, who likes to act very silly and flirtatious at parties. And one time he started dating a woman at his school, and when he talked with her at parties, he would act very normal and restrained. Well that made everyone figure it out right away! She was the only woman he wasn’t hugging and flirting with! So try very hard to not make that mistake – be just as weird with each other as you’ve already been.
Secondly, you two might want to develop some sort of code, to arrange to communicate. If your friends see either of you excitedly texting someone, they’ll know something’s up – and seeing you talk will be way worse. So when one of you wants to communicate with the other, have a way of telling them to get alone and then text or call.
Third, the toughest part of this will be finding ways to meet. I’m guessing you and he probably hang out at the same sorts of places your friends do. So you’ll need to come up with some others – which is especially difficult if neither of you drive yet!
And fourth – I have to add one other thought, which is… So What!
It’s great that you two are liking each other, and that you are having such a good time. Why exactly is it that you need to keep it secret from everyone else? Even if you have a rocky history together, so have every couple in every romantic comedy ever made! People love these sorts of stories!
So I’m all for you two keeping things confidential between you for as long as you can. But if you last long enough, someone’s sure to figure it out. And when they do… ENJOY IT!
Thanks again. And please just once, instead of giving him a regular kiss, give him a lick on the nose for me. And have him give you one back too!
Have a BLAST!