Should you tell someone you have a crush on them when they’re away?

Lil Chen asks: I like this boy and I wanna confess to him,– he’s two years younger than me but more mature – but he won’t be back till Christmas or Summer. Should I tell him straight up through Facebook or do I wait? I can’t talk to someone when they’re right in front of me cuz I get really nervous, especially with confessions (though this will be my first ever confession). Please help me.

Hi Lil Chen –


Oh that’s frustrating!!  But I’m not sure I see why there’s such a hurry to confess your feelings to him.  I’m all for openness, and I know there’s nothing that feels better than to splash your love right into someone’s face (you humans do that with words – I do it with a big-tongue lick right across their mouth and nose!).  But in this case, I worry that it might be a bit risky.  If he’s not happy to hear it, and either ignores you or writes back that he doesn’t share your feelings, then you’re going to probably feel bad.  And if he is happy to hear it, and says he feels the same way about you, then you’re apart from each other for six months, but not able to go out and meet other people because you’ll be kind of committed to each other.  And then, what if one of you meets someone else you like between now and then?  Then everything gets really messy and hurtful!


When my beloved Handsome leaves town, he usually drops me off at the home of his friends Marie and Eric.  And they’re just great.  I miss him of course, but I sure don’t act it.  I jump all over them and play with them, and cuddle up next to them at night… I live my life fully.  And that’s exactly what he wants me to do too – his great fear is that I’ll be unhappy, so he’s so glad to hear I’m not!  Then of course, when he gets back, I jump into his arms and everything’s great.


So my suggestion would be that you be that way for now.  Stay in touch with him, be friendly, share jokes, get to know each other better.  And then, when he’s back in town, if you two have stayed close, maybe you’ll have the basis of a great relationship.  But if you find that you don’t, then you won’t have lost anything either.


(But if you completely disagree with what I’ve said… I have NO problem with you completely opening up to him and starting a long-distance relationship!  Just know that you’re being a bit risky in doing so.)



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