Ritika asks: I am a 16 year old. There was this guy who I fell in love with. We dated for 4 1/2 months and then broke up because I did not want to kiss him. Then he asked my best friend out and she said no. Then after 3 months I started hanging out with another guy, and my ex got jealous and he asked me out. I said no. Now its been a month; he has found another girlfriend and is happy. But the truth is I have always loved him and still do. I get jealous of his girlfriend and cry a lot for him. My best friend doesn’t know that I still love him. It’s been one and a half years since I fell in love with him, and moving on is very hard for me. I just cannot let any other guy take his place, and now even if I have to kiss him to get him back I don’t mind. What should I do?
Wow Ritika! You’ve lived a lifetime in the last couple of years, haven’t you!
I do have a thought for you, though. I think the real issue here is that you might find that you actually like kissing! It sounds to me like this boy is still interested in you, and his current relationship might not last that long. If I’m right, then my advice is that you jump right in there when he’s available, and ask him out (don’t wait for him to ask you out; he probably won’t realize that you’re interested). And when you do go out with him, KISS HIM!
Remember that he’s been rejected by you twice, so he’s probably going to have trouble trusting that you’ll be the sort of girlfriend he wants. So you’re going to need to prove it to him. And that’s why I’m saying to kiss him, not to wait for him to kiss you. (Note – I’m not saying you need to take things any further! I’m okay with things going a little outside your comfort zone, but we don’t want you doing anything you really don’t want to!)
And you will need, if this relationship is to work out this time, to find ways to talk with him about what he wants and what you want.
And, if I’m wrong, and he stays with this current girlfriend, then Ritika it will be your job, for yourself, to find another boy, and work through these things with him. There’s nothing wrong with where you’re at; it’s just a case of moving forward at your own pace.
But I gotta say – I just love kissing! I love jumping on people and licking their faces and I love licking food off their hands, and I love it when people kiss me on the nose – it’s all so great. I really think you need to give it a chance; once you do, you might find you just can’t stop, and keep kissing people, and getting kissed back, for the rest of your life!
Cheers,
Shirelle