How to deal with mixed signals from someone you like

xxxDarkMusicLoverxxx asks: Remember when I asked you about my best friend? Well now a friend of mine is going to have a quinceanera, and I am a Dama and so need to find a guy to dance with. I want to ask him my best friend, but lately it seems like he doesn’t want to talk to me at all… I really want to ask him if he will dance with me…but I have a feeling that he got back 2gether with the girl he’s in love with…and I am hurting so much right now! I really want to tell him how I feel bout him but I don’t know what he would say. Also when I told him I might be going to the mall about 2 days ago, he said to tell him which mall because he might go and show up like a creepy stalker person. And another time he freaked me out by texting me to call because the girl he’s in love with was beating him and stuff. I couldn’t call him at the time so… I don’t know what to do and what to say… Please help me… I feel so lost! 🙁

Hi xxxDarkMusicLoverxxx!


My friend, your situation just seems to get more and more complex!  I totally want to sniff this guy out, and maybe then I can tell when he’s telling the truth, when he’s being coy, and when he doesn’t really know what he’s feeling at all!  I completely understand how his behavior is driving you nuts – it’s almost got me there too!!!


And so here’s my point.  Your main problem right now isn’t about your relationship, or your friend’s 15th birthday party.  It’s the craziness this guy is making you go through!  So your job is to find a way to get out of this wackiness.  And I think the best way is going to be for you to ask him to the dance.  If he says no, it’ll hurt, but you’ll at least know that he’s not interested in going out with you (which, of course, isn’t the same as his not being at all interested in you!).  If he says yes, he might be thinking of it just as you being two friends going to a party together, but at least he won’t be avoiding you.  And if he says OhMyGoshYesI’mSoHappyYouAsked!  and buys you a corsage and treats you like a total princess and nervously hesitates before daring to kiss you goodnight…  I think you’re in pretty good shape!


And if he STILL gives you mixed signals…  Oh heck I’d say to just bite him!


Good Luck!!


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