What to do when you meet your crush and they like you

polarbear asks: She was in my school and I had a major crush on her, but I could never even speak to her later after school. She went to a different college from me, but after some time I met her on a bus, and she smiled and said hi. I too smiled and wished her hello, and left since I was in hurry. I then searched her on Instagram and started chatting with her. She replied. So what should I do now? Should I ask her out on a date and tell about the crush?

Hi polarbear –

WOW what a great story!  It sounds like it should be a song!

Now I’d have to know a lot more about her to be able to give you definite advice on what to do or when, but the one thing that’s VERY clear is that she has initiated contact, so you should keep chatting and being friendly at least!

My suggestion would be that you

take this time to get to know her better.  You knew she was lovely before, but crushes are kind of fantasies – now you get to find out who she really is!  What does she like, what does she hate, what bores her, what fascinates her… all that kind of stuff.  And of course, let her know more about you, especially things she might find interesting.

And when you find something you two have in common (“You love skating? Wow so do I!”) or even something you can fake a bit (“You love K-Pop?  Wow, I’ve always wanted to go to a K-Pop concert!” [even though you’ve never had the slightest desire to before!]), then yeah, ask her out! 

And as far as telling her about the crush, I think you can hold off for a little while.  Wait till you get to know each other better, and she trusts you enough not to be scared off by you saying it.

Although honestly, I find that most crushes are so obvious that everyone around, including the object of the affection, has known all along anyway!  So your telling her could just be sweet confirmation of what she already knows.

But again, my main statement to this is I LOVE THIS STORY!  Please let me know how things go forward!

Thanks again, and BEST OF LUCK!

Shirelle

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